Last Wednesday I gave Mark a choice. I said that I could not date someone who didn't make me a priority. And that means that when I ask for emotional support - for help - I deserve to get it.
I don't ask often. And I don't ask for a lot.
But having asked and been ignored, I was at the point where I had nothing to lose.
So I told him that after 18 months, he knew me well enough to decide if he could be with me. And that if he wanted to continue our relationship, he had to put me ahead of his childhood desires to play all summer, hang out with his sister and have no responsibilities.
He had, after 18 months, a responsibility to me. And I needed to be in a relationship that is supportive and committed.
He could not respond. I sensed he was hurt and very upset - perhaps angry. So we got off the phone. And he has not called me back.
Meanwhile, I miss him. I miss Emma. I miss Dave. I miss thinking that I will see Montana again. I don't want to wear the shirt he gave me as a gift, or dust his sculpture. I don't want to see him... But I don't want to "not see him again," either.
It's been a strange couple of days.
I'll let you know how it goes.
About Me
Photographic Evidence of a Life Well Lived
The last month with short hair
Please Sir, Can I have some more beer?
2 comments:
18 months in, he's at the point where you have to force him to make you a priority and HE'S upset?!
You're not supposed to be a mistress or a trophy wife unless the guy you're with is already married to someone. :)
Hang in there, Antje. I'm not sure how much time he needs -- or should get -- to decide if he hasn't already.
You need what you need. And you shouldn't have to apologize for it. But I know this hurts. I'm so sorry.
Post a Comment